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By Valerie Grosz for LIFELines
When she went into labor, Tish e-mailed her husband, who was on deployment halfway around the world. Capt Petersen read his e-mail from a base in Kuwait and called the labor and delivery room in San Diego, California, every 15 minutes until he finally heard the blessed words, "It's a boy."
Tish's husband had deployed when she was seven months pregnant. The only thing she could think about then was, "Can I do this alone?"
For the hundreds of thousands of troops deployed to the Middle East, communication is limited, and when you're pregnant, you need regular support.
Thousands of reservists are also being called to active duty and many will leave pregnant wives behind as they answer our nation's call to fight the war on terrorism. Because a reservist can live hundreds of miles from a military base, spouses may feel isolated from support networks and base resources. Geography aside, spouses of reservists can still get involved and capitalize on military resources.
Find Emotional Support in Friends
After your husband deploys, fill your house and daily routine with friends and activities. A group of friends and family, if they live in the area, can be the emotional support you need when the little bundle of joy arrives. Being involved in organizations like the Navy Family Ombudsman Program, the Key Volunteer Network, enlisted and officer spouse clubs, or command family support groups help in forming meaningful friendships.
The Naval Reserve Command and Marine Corps Forces Reserve encourage spouses of reservists to participate in the Naval Reserve Ombudsman Program and Reserve Key Volunteer Network. These programs help reserve spouses form social networks with others who might live in their area, as well as keep them informed of the command.
Take Advantage of New Parent Support Programs
Reservists remain eligible for exchange and commissary privileges, and when reservists are activated, their spouses are also entitled to all other base privileges, including New Parent Support Programs on bases in any branch of the military.
The New Parent Support Program (NPSP), a part of the Navy's Fleet and Family Support Division, is a voluntary program for Navy expectant parents and new parents with children under 4 months of age. NPSP identifies needs and provides information and referrals for on-base and community services. NPSP also offers a variety of support and hands-on classes and programs designed to teach parents the essentials of infant care, parental stress, and financial boundaries.
Programs include:
- support groups for breast feeding mothers, new parents, and single parents
- Budgeting for Baby
- home visits by caring professionals
- developmental screenings
- play groups
The Marine New Parent Support Program (NPSP) offers military and community resources and referrals, and NPSP offers several courses and programs designed to help new moms and dads learn about labor and delivery, infant care, physical and emotional recovery from childbirth, and responsible parenting.
Programs include:
- Mommy's Basic Training
- Dad's Baby Boot Camp
- parenting classes
- play mornings
- home visits by registered nurses or licensed social workers
The ultimate goal of the Navy and Marine Corps New Parent Support Programs is prevention of family violence through support and useful advice to parents. Individual bases vary in their available programs, and some bases offer free childcare. Search your naval base or the MCCS program locater for the nearest New Parent Support Program.
Navy-Marine Corps Relief Society Offers Financial Support
Before you give birth, you can attend several seminars and classes to help prepare for family life. The Navy-Marine Corps Relief Society offers Budget for Baby, a seminar dealing with the financial aspects of having a baby. This course focuses on ways to shortcut expenses by using a variety of resources on and off base. Attendees receive a bag of baby's first necessities, including crib sheets, blankets, and clothes.
Support From the Naval Hospital
Naval hospitals hold nursing and labor seminars and most have lactation consultants who will provide emotional and medical support concerning nursing for military spouses, including reserve spouses. Also, you can speak to a registered nurse about issues you might have about yourself or your new baby through TRICARE's 24-hour hotline.
When a reservist is called up for active duty for more then 30 consecutive days, his benefit status with his current job may change. Pregnant spouses should be aware of TRICARE Reserve Benefits, which include the TRICARE Pharmacy Program. You must be seen at a medical treatment facility (MTF) or by a TRICARE network provider. An article on the LIFELines site, Locating Military Treatment Facilities Online, can assist in locating MTF's and TRICARE providers.
Emergency Preparation
Finally, emergency situations do happen. Having a plan can offset consequences of unexpected situations.
You don't have to experience pregnancy and delivery alone, even if your husband finds himself on deployment during these precious times. Let your base resources fill some of the voids left by your deployed spouse. While he is answering the nation's call to duty, you are answering nature's call to life.
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